Lou's Most Excellent Spanish Eggs

"Do you know how to fry an egg?" asked Eduardo.

And there I was, being challenged, in my own kitchen. The talk of making omelet's and fritata's with lots of olive oil had been discussed at length up to this point. This man knows his olive oils and he definitely is telling me he knows how to fry an egg. I'm struggling. I'm thinking.

"But of course. You, uh, you know, uh....use a lot of olive oil. About this much," and I pinch my two fingers together to about 1/8 an inch.

"No, no," he replies. And he takes his thumb and index finger and and spreads them to a width of 1/2 an inch. That's a lot of oil.

In fact, in Spanish, the equivalent saying of "he can't make a piece of toast" is "he can't fry an egg." Everyone in Spain knows how to fry an egg.

They take it up one level. And when you fry an egg Spanish style, you get it.

Eggs
Extra virgin olive oil
Sea salt

In a non stick pan - this will really help - pour about a 1/4 to 1/2 inch of olive oil into it. Heat it up to medium high: add about two drops of water to the pan while heating. When they begin to pop your oil is ready. Do not get it to smoke point but to just near.

Add the eggs. Here I put two in some small bowls and poured in together - it was a little easier since I was making four.

They'll sizzle pretty hard. Take your spatula and loosen them from the bottom and lap the hot oil over the top of the eggs. Gently swirl the pan to get the same effect.

These will cook fast - perhaps in less than a minute. When the whites look set, using a slotted spoon, remove from the oil, plate, and add some sea salt.

Dive in, savor the runny, hot - but not set - yolk. Serve with crusty bread to pick up all that stuff on the plate. Yummy.

Lou's Most Excellent Smashed Spicy Squash

This was adapted from, I think, an original recipe from Jamie Oliver. I've modified it quite a bit.

You can use this as a dip for crusty baguette or as a side dish. Best part is that it's easy, relatively healthy for you (albeit it's got a shitload of olive oil in it), and pretty much everyone likes it.

I've "twisted" this version a bit. What's written is what I did tonight but I've noted what I usually do. I'm certain that Sichuan peppercorns are not usually found in most home kitchens....

...and these are wonderful things. They have an unusual property of creating a numbing sensation, especially on the lips. They're not hot like a classical hot pepper nor pungetly-sneezy like black pepper. Dare I say it (and risk sounding like an idiot from a TV show hyped up on uppers): they're kind'a fun.

Lookie here though: these lil' bastards can pack a punch that you're not used to and may not be expecting. If not familiar with them I suggest you cut the amount I call for in half or just use red pepper flakes to a level you like. Your lips and tongue will numb up, almost like on Novocaine, but the heat sensation is not blinding. It's there, but different. I suppose there was a reason they were illegal in the US up until a few years ago (really).

[Note: this dish takes about 45 minutes to make. Most of it is just waiting around but for a veggie/side/app, you should know that this isn't very quick.]

1 leek, white part only, thinly chopped
1 tsp Sichuan peppercorns, coarsely ground (normal: 1 TSP red pepper flakes)
3 garlic cloves, minced (use less if you're not into garlic)
1 tsp Herbs de Provence
4 medium zucchini
1 medium eggplant, peeled (optional - good for stretching)
A lot of extra virgin olive oil
Salt - I've been using sea salt as of late

In a 3 - 4 quart pot (pending if you're using an eggplant or not), add about 3 TBS of olive oil over low heat. Add the leek and sweat it over medium-low heat for about 10 minutes until softened.

Meanwhile, cut the zucchini into big chunks as so:

Cut two in half lengthwise, then into 8 pieces.
Cut one in half lengthwise, then into 4 pieces.
Cut the last into 5 pieces.

Look - do whatever. You need some big pieces and small pieces and that's the deal. If using the eggplant, cut big cubes (say, 2"x1" and some smaller ones that are 1"x1"). I'm certain you'll figure it out. Set aside.

Add the peppercorns and cook for about 2 minutes; the fat from the oil helps release the "heat" from the peppercorns. Add in the garlic and cook for about 1 minute, then the zucchini, eggplant (if using), herbs, and about 2 TBS more oil. Toss to mix, set heat to medium low, cover, and let simmer for about 20 minutes undisturbed.

After about 20 minutes remove the lid and using a flat-ended thinger (this is my favorite tool for doing this - a flat wooden spatula),

smash the shit out of the pieces. Some will stay big, some will not...this is a result of starting with a melange of sizes. The largest pieces remaining should be as big as the smallest you started with (make sense?).

At this point salt to taste and you'll quickly find out if you made it too hot too. If so, there ain't much you can do at this point except Plan B: live up to it or Plan C: go get a bag of frozen broccoli and serve that.

Set heat to simmer and let simmer uncovered for another 20 min.

Serve as you wish....

Lou's Most Excellent Hatcho Risotto

The first posting from France! An accomplishment it 'twas. Still (and will be for a while) getting used to the kitchen here, which has a lack of storage space and a joke of a stove (I have to manually light the burners each time I turn one on). So, if I can do it here YOU can easily do it.

This was too good to be true. One, the risotto itself. Two, "finding" Hatch-like chili's in France!

This was actually quite simple to make (and very tasty).

To make it vegetarian just remove the salami - you likely won't miss what it adds (I used the salami for another dish).

2 ½ inch/1.5 cm thick slices of salami
2 TBS EVOO
1 TBS unsalted butter
1 large shallot, minced
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 Hatch chili, roasted and diced to ½ inch/1.5 cm cubed pieces
3 cups chicken broth
1 cup arborio rice
1 ounce/25 grams brie de meaux, rind removed (brie or camembert good substitutes)
Half package (4 oz./100g of prepared bitter greens (frisée, raddichio, and argula mix)
Sea salt

In a 3 quart (3 liter) pot over medium heat add the salami slices and cook until crispy and the fat has rendered off. Remove the salami - save it for the chicken if you're going to do that - and add the olive oil and butter. Toss in the shallot and about 2 TSP sea salt and saute for 8 minutes until softened. Add in the garlic and Hatch chili and saute for about 2 minutes.

Turn the heat up to medium high and pour in the rice; saute for about 2 minutes. Add about 1 cup of the chicken broth - or enough to cover the rice - and return to a boil, stirring constantly. As the broth boils off add more to keep the rice covered. Do this for about 10 minutes and then check the rice for doneness - it should be a little crunchy.

Stir in the cheese until melted and then add in the greens. Stir until the greens soften (about 2 minutes, tops) and serve immediately.

Lou's Most Excellent Sweety Leeks

Need a different side? Here you go. Works well with anything (assuming you like what's in this to start with). Leeks are filthy veggies - always loaded with dirt n' shit. Make sure you clean 'em (I'll tell you how).

3 large leeks
8 pieces of raw okra, sliced into ¼ inch slices
¼ fennel bulb, sliced very thin
3 garlic cloves, minced
1 TBS fresh ginger, finely minced
1 TBS minced parsley
1 cup Gewurztraminer wine
Extra virgin olive oil
Sea salt

Clean the leeks. Take each leek and cut the bottom ½ inch off then go ½ inch into the green end and cut the leaves off. Discard the bottom and top. Halve each leek longitudinally. Discard the outer layer and rinse the leek under cool water, fanning it, to remove all the dirt.

Slice the leeks very thin, as thin as you can without slicing your finger tips off (which shouldn't happen if you know how to chop, but I do this wrong all the time).

In a medium non-stick skillet, over medium heat add the olive oil and warm to shimmer. Add the okra and sauté for about 3 minutes, tossing to keep even. Add in the garlic and ginger and saute for 30 more seconds, then throw in all the leeks with about 2 TSP of sea salt. Toss to mix and reduce heat to medium-low. Toss every-so-often to keep the cooking even over the course of 5 minutes. Add half the wine to the mix and continue to cook for five more minutes, then add the rest of the wine and cook for 2 - 3 more minutes, until the leeks are tender. Add in the parsley and serve immediately.

I topped off some halibut on mashed cauliflower with this mixture. Pretty good.

Lou's Most Excellent Honeyed Asparagus

It's very easy to do grilled asparagus: coat with olive oil, garlic, and salt and pepper. Grill. Too bad it gets really boring after awhile. Oh boy, grilled asparagus, again. Doesn't that sum'bitch come up with anything new?

So if boredom's got you down, try this.

1 pound fresh asparagus
Macadamia nut oil
Sea salt
1 small shallot, minced
1 clove garlic, minced
2 TBS honey
1 fennel bulb, cut into ¼ inch rings and halved

Cut the bottom inch off the asparagus and plunge the stalks into about 2 inches of fresh, cold water. Let them sit for 30 minutes. [This helps rejuvenate the stuff - it really works]

If the asparagus is thick (thicker than your pinky finger thick), lightly peel the stalks with a veggie peeler being careful not to peel your finger, like I did. It was a gusher - took 30 minutes to stop. This photo is 3 days later.

In a baking dish large enough to hold all the asparagus, sprinkle with sea salt and then coat with about 2 TBS of macadamia nut oil. Add the shallot, garlic, and honey to the mix and then add in the fennel.

Grill over direct fire until lightly browned. Serve immediately.

Lou's Most Excellent Breakfast Tacos

Few things other than this can start your day any better.

Breakfast tacos are a funny thing. They're either great or absolutely lousy, with the latter being the usual case here in DC (assuming you can get them to start with). Super easy to make, a taco like this is immensely satisfying. I ate two - I could'a eaten four more.

The tortilla is what really makes or breaks these things. Fresh, flour tortillas (fajita sized) work great. However, if you have access to fresh corn tortillas, give those a shot. We used a brand (corn) from La Tortilla Factory. They're the best packaged corn tortilla's I've come across.

Cooking potatoes for breakfast is also a pain: they take too damned long. Here I've made the potato chunks a little smaller and cooked with the onion, over medium heat and covered, to speed the cooking. It cut the time in half.

This is also a great breakfast to feed a small army who stayed over. Very scalable.

You can add other stuff to these things too. Breakfast meats (chorizo, breakfast sausage, ham, bacon) go great in them but don't go overboard - it's easy to over load these things.

[For four good sized tacos.]

5 eggs (I used 5 whites and one whole egg)
1 medium red skinned potato, coarsely peeled and chopped into ¼" chunks
1 small onion, cut into ¼" chunks
1 whole pickled Jalapeno (or 8 presliced ones), diced
1 TBS canola oil
½ can (8 oz) refried beans, reheated according to directions
Grated cheddar cheese
4 flour or corn tortillas
Salt & pepper
Picante sauce or favorite salsa

In a large, non-stick skillet, add 1 TBS of canola oil over medium heat. Add the the potato and onion, toss in oil, sprinkle with a pinch of salt, and saute for about 5 minutes uncovered. Add the Jalapeno pepper, toss, and cover with a small, domed lid and let cook for another 4 - 5 minutes.
Meanwhile....

Preheat (over medium) a small skillet that can hold the tortillas. As that's going on.....

Beat the eggs together with a pinch of salt and a few cranks of pepper.
When the potatoes/onions are done add to the pan and scramble together.

Reheat the tortillas in the small skillet, one at a time, and set aside covered in a clean kitchen towel.

Spread a layer of beans on the tortilla, top with a generous helping of eggs, and top with grated cheese. Add picante/salsa/hot sauce to your content.

Feed the dog when you're finished.

Lou's Most Excellent Easy Migas

"If that dog gets near my fuckin' breakfast I'm gonna kill him." - JKF, October 11, 2009.

My wife, JKF, has that in common with the dog b/c if you get near his breakfast he's likely to kill you too.

JKF also introduced me to migas, which is a Mexican style of scrambled eggs with tortilla's in them. It's a great way to use up staled corn tortillas...if you have them.

And most often, one doesn't. But tortilla chips work just fine.

I should not be eating eggs. If you haven't guessed it by the blog here, I pretty much eat anything with reckless abandon and I shouldn't. Eggs are LOADED with cholesterol. I mean, they're a cholesterol delivery vehicle. One egg gives you about 80% of your daily USDA recommended cholesterol intake. Now think about a three egg omelet with cheese, ham and fried in butter. Buttered toast on the side and you're done.

Egg whites, however, are virtually cholesterol and fat free. But they taste like egg whites and are watery and just ick scrambled up.

Compromise here: 2 parts egg white plus 1 whole egg. Sure, it's still running high with fat & cholesterol but tastes pretty damned good. In this recipe, which is for two, I use 5 whites plus 1 whole, which still works pretty well.

5 egg whites + 1 whole egg [extra large sized eggs], scrambled
3 TBS chopped onion
1 Jalapeno pepper, minced
1 big handfull of tortilla chips
¼ cup of cheese of your choice (fontina used here)
Canola oil
Salt & pepper

Heat a non-stick pan over medium heat. Add a TBS of canola oil to the pan and the onion. Saute for about 3 minutes. Add the Jalapeno and saute for an additional minute and then add the eggs all at once.

Let the eggs sit for about 30 seconds, just until it's solidifying on the bottom. Crush the chips with your hands and add to the eggs, continuing to cook the eggs the way you normally make scrambled eggs. With 30 seconds left on the clock, remove from the heat, add the cheese, toss to mix and voila.

You can eat these alone or put them in a tortilla to make a breakfast taco. Judy went for the taco but I went with a bagel on the side since they were fresh from the Old Georgetown Bagelry.

Lou's Most Excellent Fried Artichoke Fried Pasta

I made this as a side dish for our left over Four Figgy Chicky last night. Turned out very tasty and easy to put together. Plus, how can you go wrong with fried artichoke hearts?

The artichokes themselves are great on their own - they'd make a great appetizer...which we ourselves had four of prior to dinner.

Half a box of spaghetti
1 12 ounce can of artichoke hearts in water
1 large tomato
1 garlic clove, minced
1 cup dry white wine (Sauvignon Blanc used here)
Flour
Extra virgin olive oil
Salt & pepper
Parmesan cheese

Cook the spaghetti right to al dente. Once there, immediately drain and transfer to a bowl full of ice water. Set aside.

Peel the tomato using a veggie peeler or a ton of patience using a paring knife. You could also "shock" the tomato in boiling water for 15 seconds then plunging into an ice bath too. Either way, get the skin off the tomato. Remove the seeds and cut the flesh into ½ inch chunks. Set aside.

In a large skillet heat about 2 - 3 TBS of olive oil over medium. Drain and rinse the artichokes. Cut each 'choke in half along the length of the 'choke. Sprinkle the open half with salt and pepper and then dredge each half in the flour. [That's right - no additional egg dredge here as I'm keeping the mess down and the process simple.]

Once the oil is hot (water drops should spatter when added) place the artichokes, cut side down, into the pan. Let fry for about 3 - 4 minutes; turn one over to check for doneness, which is when the 'choke has a nice light brown crust on it. Flip the chokes and repeat. Remove the chokes onto a paper towel and immediately sprinkle generously with Parmesan cheese.

Add the garlic to the hot oil; it will begin to turn brown. RIGHT when this starts to happen add the tomato (and any residual juices on the cutting board) and toss to mix. Cook an additional minute to heat the tomato through and then add ½ cup of the wine.

Let the wine simmer off to half then add the remaining wine. Simmer down to half again and then increase the heat to medium high.

Drain the cold pasta and remove as much water as possible - add the pasta to the pan. Careful here as it will spit a bit. Toss to mix as you gently/lightly/oh-do-delicately fry the pasta, about three minutes.

Plate the pasta and place the 'chokes on top of the pasta nest; add additional Parmesan if desired (and when is it not?).

Voila.....

Lou's Most Excellent Hatch & Spinach Pesto

This is likely going over some pasta with shrimp and scallops but I can think of half a dozen other uses as well. Just alone over pasta would be enough, come to think about it.

When I make pesto I use cashews instead of pine nuts. The reason is simple: it's different. I also find that cashews tend to impart a more buttery texture to the pesto which gives it a nice mouthfeel.

Also, before embarking on adding peppers to this you need to judge the heat of them first. The heat here will build on you the more you eat of the sauce. In addition, the next day the flavors will have mellowed out with each other and result in a better tasting - and likely hotter - sauce. As there is a lot of fat in this (it is pesto, after all), said fat will line your mouth and deceive the presence of most of the heat...until it washes off your tongue and the capsaicin is left sticking to it as you eat more.

Resist the urge to add more garlic: the highlight of this pesto are the chilies. I know I know, I too am part of the more-garlic-is-better crowd but this is one area where less is, in fact, more.

10 oz baby spinach leaves
1 packed cup of fresh basil
2 - 4 roasted Hatch or Anaheim chili peppers
2 cloves garlic
1/3 cup unsalted, roasted cashews
4 TBS grated Parmesan
Salt
~1 cup extra virgin olive oil
~1 cup of boiling water

Quick blanch the baby spinach by setting it in a large colander over the sink and pouring 2 quarts of boiling water over the leaves. Immediately run cold water over the spinach to cool. Squeeze out as much water as you can and then lay the leaves on a kitchen towel and roll the towel to dry the leaves. Give the towel a gentle twist to aid this.

Remove the skin and seeds from the chili peppers and dice into dime sized chunks.

In a food processor add the cashews and pulse a few times until they're chopped up. Add the basil, spinach, chili peppers, and peeled garlic cloves to the processor and run for about 30 seconds, stopping to push the mixture down the side. Do this about two times. Add the cheese, ¼ TSP of salt and pulse to mix.

With the processor running add the olive oil in a steady stream. You're nearly done adding oil when the pesto is no longer sticking to the sides of the processor and has become a smooth sauce with the consistency of...pesto. When this happens add another ¼ cup of oil. Finally, add about 2 - 3 TBS of boiling water to help incorporate and smooth out.

Lou's Most Excellent Spicy Tequila Succotash

I never say this when I make something before it's done, but while scooping this into the bowl - before I even tasted it - I said to Judy, "This is gonna be f'ing good."

Turns out I was right. So right that this morning Judy wanted this as her side dish for her sandwich this afternoon instead of Cheetos, which are pretty hard to pass up.

A lot of things went into this and I think some could even be left out if you don't have them, such as the parsley, chives, and Romano cheese. Otherwise this comes together pretty quick and is a different take on the classic succotash.

Two ears fresh corn
One medium zucchini
Two roasted Hatch or Anaheim chili peppers
One jalapeno pepper
3 TBS Tequila
1 TBS butter
2 TBS heavy cream
2 TBS grated Parmesan
1 TBS grated Peccorino-Romano
1 TBS minced parsley
1 TSP minced chives
Salt

Shuck the corn and cut off the kernels, set aside. Cut the zucchini in half, then quarter each piece and halve each of those; you wind up with each piece cut into eighths. Cut the inner wedge/seeds out of each by running a knife up each piece so you are only left with the skin of the zucchini with about ¼ inch of flesh. Dice the zucchini into corn-kernel sized chunks.

Remove the skins and seeds from the chili peppers; cut into dime sized chunks. Remove the seeds from the jalapeno and finely dice.

In a large, non-stick skillet heat to medium-high. Add the butter and allow it to brown, then add the corn and zucchini bits. Allow to sit for 3 - 4 minutes undisturbed, then quickly toss. Check to see that the vegetables are browning. If they aren't, let them sit longer prior to tossing. Do this for about 10 minutes; check for doneness by eating a corn kernel. Add the peppers when the corn is done and cook an additional 3 minutes.

Add the Tequila and mix, let simmer off for 3 - 4 minutes and then add the cream. Toss in the cheeses, mix, then add the herbs. Add salt to taste...in our case we didn't need any as all the flavors worked without the need.

Lou's Most Excellent Cucumber Gin & Tonic

Gin and tonic is that drink that your drunk aunt on your dads side would always get. As the evenings would wear on, the more she asked for them, the more they got diluted down by her daughter-in-law.

No need for a snarky remark about how dirty the house or misbehaved the kids are, right?

Here's an update to the G&T. I was inspired by this from Hendrick's gin : they suggest you garnish the G&T with a cucumber slice.

Why not add the cucumber into it?

Try it: you'll like it. A lot. It becomes our drink of the summer when it's just too damned hot.


2 English (seedless) cucumbers, coarsely peeled, quartered and chopped*
Gin
Tonic
Soda water
Salt

In a blender or food processor, add the cucumber, ½ cup of cold water, and a big pinch of salt. Liquify for about 1½ - 2 minutes. Strain the pulp through a mesh strainer and reserve the juice; discard the pulp. Do not force the pulp through the strainer as you just want the juice.

In you favorite G&T glass fill to the top with ice. Follow these ratios:

1 part gin
1 part cucumber juice
1 part tonic
1 part soda

Stir to mix and serve. The juice will also keep in the fridge for about 3 days. Dot experiment with these ratios too; I find that 2 parts tonic gives that extra fizz but then adds more tonic flavor hence why I add soda. Get the flavor you like and have fun doing it.

*Figure about 1 cucumber for 2 -3 drinks, pending how big you make them.

Lou's Most Excellent Guacamole

What is guacamole?

For starters it's about 95% avocado. And that means if you've got crappy avocados you're going to get crappy guacamole. QED: you need great avocados. A great, ripe avocado is somewhat soft to the touch. The kind of soft that if you pinch too hard you get a little worried you damaged it.

That's a ripe-I'm-ready-for-guacamole avocado. Anything harder don't bother with. Really...and I'm sorry to say that if that's all you got...you ain't having great guacamole tonight.

Avocado's originate in the New World from the tree Persica americana. Avocado's are not a fruit but rather a berry: it's a long story and I'm not getting into it as it has to do with ovaries and such with plants. Speaking of "such," the word 'avocado' derives from āhuacatl, which is the Azetecan/Nahuatl word for 'testicle'.

Nice!

Anyways. There are two main types of avocados found in the US: Haas (the black, rough ones) and Fuerte (the big green ones with smooth skin). The Fuerte's tend to be much larger so adjust as necessary as this recipe is written for Haas berries.

3 ripe (and I mean ripe) Haas avocados
½ yellow onion, minced
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 Jalapeno, finely chopped
1 Roma tomato, seeded and chopped
2 TBS unsalted butter
Juice of one lime
Salt

In a small skillet sweat the onion with three big pinches of salt in the butter over medium-low heat. It should barely be simmering. You're goal here is to make the onions translucent without browning. This will take about 5 - 7 minutes. In the last 30 seconds add the garlic and Jalapeno.

Let cool to near room temperature, about 15 minutes.

Peel the avocados and put the pulp into a bowl. Add the onion mixture and lime juice; coarsely mix then add in the tomatoes. I like my guacamole with a few chunks of avocado in it and not fully pureed.

Add additional salt if needed.

To store the guacamole without it browning, put a layer of plastic wrap directly on top of the guacamole, trying to remove as much air as possible. Store in the fridge for up to two days; remove from fridge 30 minutes prior to serving.

Lou's Most Excellent Kitchen Tips: Grilled Pizza

I make a pretty mean grilled pizza. It's really not that hard to do if you have a grill and some gumption. It does take some attention to detail as even slight variations can really mess this up.

The following tips are more of a guide for grilling pizza rather than an actual recipe. I've included a dough and sauce recipe that I've used many, many times that works well. However, if you have access to a local wood fired pizza shop, see if you can buy some dough from them. They've spent the better part of their career perfecting their dough and will likely sell it too you cheaper than what it would cost to buy the ingredients.

Avoid pizza dough from your local grocery, including Trader Joe’s. These have been handled a bit too hard and you may not know how old they are (a dough shouldn’t be held at fridge temp for more than three days). What results from grilling these is a chewy, undercooked crust that’s often difficult to work with.

It is important for the dough to have a high gluten content - this allows you to stretch the dough easily. Since you're aiming for a thin crust that's critical. Typical high-gluten flours are general "all purpose" types.

I cannot stress that enough: thin crust. As in nearly ½ to ¼ inch thin. With a relaxed, high gluten crust this won't be difficult.

Everything you want on your pizza should be ready in advance and within easy reach. From rolling the dough to topping to on the grill should take no more than 5 minutes. An assembly line is ideal.

Ingredients should be at or near room temperature too.

Equipment: cutting board, thin cookie sheet or pizza paddle, large metal spatula, grill tongs, grill mitt.

The grill. The hotter the fire the better. Gas grills, because they’re prone to condensation and do not get as hot, are not ideal for cooking pizza but do the job. Make sure it’s been on for at least 30 minutes before using it.

A BIG indirect fire is what you want, meaning, the coals/fire is on one half of the grill and the other half is empty.

Use real wood if you can and quartered splits if you can find them (hickory preferred). Splits last longer and burn hotter. If using briquettes use a lot of them - about 8 - 10 pounds. Lump charcoal is great but the fire will burn out quickly; be prepared to continually feed it if using lump.

Count on at least an hour to have the fire ready; longer if using splits.

Do not use a pizza stone on the grill unless the stone says you can. Most stones are not rated for temperatures above 600 degrees.

When rolling the pizza dough be generous with flour to prevent sticking to the rolling surface and easier manipulation on the paddle. Corn meal also works to prevent sticking; use this when done shaping the dough.

Shaping. I tend to make my pizzas in the shape of a 14 inch oblong “football.” Roundness works but I find that with the haste of getting this done shape isn't so much a worry. I've made pizza shapes that would make Picasso envious. A) It's still gonna taste the same and B) gives it some more homemade character.

Also make sure the crust isn’t too big. You should make it so you have at least 2 - 3” of clearance from the sides of the grill to allow easier manipulation and more even heat distribution around it.

Since the pizzas are small count on one pizza per person. This is part of the fun: you're making multiple pizzas so you can experiment with different toppings and combinations.

You CAN have too much when it comes to toppings. Decorate your pizzas thinly. Now is not the time for extra cheese, double pepperoni, sausage, ham, meatballs and extra sauce. Go thin on the sauce, the cheese should just barely cover the sauce, only about 6 - 8 thin slices of pepperoni, etc. Limit overall toppings to four max.

Toppings like sausage, bacon, shrimp, meatballs, chicken, broccoli and others that require long cook times should be precooked. Cut large chunks into bite sized pieces.

Force yourself to do just a classic cheese pizza first. This is the experiment and will give you a good gauge on how things are going for your baseline.

Some great combos:
- Cheese, tomato sauce, pepperoni, fresh garlic, mushroom
- Cheese, olive oil, fresh garlic, dried oregano
- Cheese, ricotta, tomato sauce OR olive oil, spinach leaves, fresh garlic
- Cheese, ricotta, tomato sauce, sausage
- Cheese, Parmesan, pepperoni, tomato sauce, cherry tomatoes, arugula (add this when finished)
- Classic Neopolitan (mozzarella, sauce, basil, olive oil drizzle)
- Classic Margherita “DOCG” (buffalo mozzarella, crushed tomatoes, basil leaves, olive oil drizzle)

Cheeses. Mozzarella (both regular and buffalo), provolone, fontina, ricotta, Parmesan all work great. A favorite blend of mine is a 75/25 mix of mozzarella and provolone.

If you have a big active fire in the grill it's not ready yet. You want the fire to die down some to mostly hot, glowing embers. Fire = burnt pizza. (Duh)

The pizzas will cook fast. Slide decorated the pizza onto the side of the grill with no coals and then close the lid for about 3 minutes. Open and using your spatula lift up the side closest to the coals; if it's browned rotate the pizza 180 degrees and close the lid again for 3 - 5 minutes. By now all the toppings should be melted. Let it set at room temp for about 2 minutes then serve immediately.

Troubleshooting
Pizza cooking slow. It's due to one or both of two things: pizza is too thick or the fire isn't hot enough. The corrections for this are easy...thinner crust or boost your fire.

Crust too thick and you can't thin it out. Low gluten content in the dough and there are a couple options here. Roll out the dough and place it on the grill with no toppings. After it's cooked some (bubbles will start to appear on the crust), flip it, and then decorate the pizza directly on the grill. You can also roll the dough out in between two sheets of parchment paper.

This is a bit tricky but it works well. When thin enough let it rest for about 5 minutes then peel off the parchment and place on the floured work surface. Work quickly.

Toppings melted, crust not crispy but chewy. You've got a low gluten crust most likely. A quick fix is to move the pizza over the fire when finished. This will crisp up the crust but will yield a pita-like consistency. If you don't say anything your guests won't know the difference.

Recipes

Lou's Most Excellent Pizza Dough

Before starting note this is an overnight recipe and you need a heavy duty electric mixer.

4½ cups all-purpose flour, sifted
1 packet instant yeast
2 TBS honey
2 TSP salt
Extra virgin olive oil

In 1.5 cups of babywarm water add the yeast, stir, and set aside for 10 minutes. If this does not begin to foam at the top after 10 minutes start over as your yeast is probably old or the water was too hot.

Combine the flour and salt in a mixing bowl and attach to your mixture with the dough hook(s). Add the yeast+water, honey, and 2 TBS of olive oil. Turn the mixture on low to combine. Now...pay attention.

The above is a very very very crucial step in pizza dough making. You don't want to overwork the dough here. If the mixer is "fighting" it too hard, meaning having a tough time, you need to add more water (if dry) or flour (if wet) by the tablespoon. The dough is done when it balls up into one solid lump and the hooks move it around the bowl. When that happens turn the mixer off for 10 - 15 minutes and let it "relax."

After this first 10 - 15 minutes turn the mixer back on for about 2 minutes. By now the dough should be somewhat of a solid clump - not too sticky, not too dry. It will have a wet appearance but will hold together. This will "feel right" almost by instinct so trust yourself here.

Plop the dough onto a floured work surface. Using a very sharp knife cut it into six equal parts and form balls out of them. Rub some olive oil over them, place on a large parchment lined cookie sheet, cover with plastic wrap and set at room temp for about 15 minutes. Place the cookie sheet in the fridge overnight.

The next day take the rounds out at least one hour before you plan to do anything with them.

Lou's Most Excellent Pizza Sauce

Simplicity is the key here so don't screw around with this too much. I don't add any sugar to my pizza sauce - it doesn't need it. If you want a sweet sauce just order Pizza Hut and call it an evening.

1 quart/box of crushed tomatoes (Pomi brand is my favorite)
3 cloves of garlic, finely minced
4 - 6 basil leaves, chiffoned
Extra virgin olive oil
Salt & pepper

Heat about 2 TBS of olive oil over medium heat in a 2 - 3 quart pot. Add the garlic and saute for about 30 seconds, then pour the tomatoes in and add the basil. Give about 4 big pinches of salt and a few cranks of pepper. Simmer for 30 minutes.